I lost my best friend. It still hurts beyond belief, and my eyes are full of tears as I write this, but I don't want this to be a sad post. I want this to be a celebratory post about how much my mom meant to me and how much of her mothering spirit I want to pass on to Delilah.
I know some people think I might be romanticizing how close my mom and I were. When somebody passes away, it's easy to remember only the good things. But those who knew me before my mom died, know that I'm not romanticizing a thing. I was her 'princess' and she was my, well, everything. A shoulder to cry on, a friend to go shopping with, an intellect to discuss books with, arms to hug & hold me, and she was definitely my biggest cheerleader. According to my mom, no one was prettier, smarter, or funnier than her daughter. Somehow we missed all the teenage angst that mothers & daughters are supposed to have...we were blessed.
-She was tiny (barely 5 feet), but she could be mighty. When I was going through multiple back surgeries in high school and college, she wasn't always happy with the level of service from the hospitals and insurance companies--she would fight so hard for me that my anesthesiologist nicknamed her 'the bulldog'.
-She was a great seamstress, a horrible housekeeper, and a mediocre cook (although her spaghetti sauce is still legend among her children and our friends!)
-She was a quick wit and knew so many facts that she never played trivial pursuit with anybody b/c she knew all the answers. If there was a game of trivial pursuit, she would just be the host and read all the questions. Rarely did she have to turn the card over to look at the answer.
-She loved cute, little things like Tweety Bird and VW Bugs.
-She had a round tummy, but great legs: more than once I witnessed a stranger compliment her on them.
-She believed in the value of community service.
-She was an avid reader and taught me that sometimes finishing that book IS more important than a few hours of sleep.
-She was a mother to everybody. When she died, more than one friend told me that they felt like they had lost their own mother.
-I hate that Delilah will grow up not knowing her, but I will try to pass on as much of her as I can. I know my mom and Red would have loved each other.
-She wasn't perfect, but she was perfect as my mom. That's all anyone can ask for.
This picture was taken in the summer of 1999 when I was staying with my aunt in NYC. My mom came to visit and we had the BEST time. It was a casual, spur-of-the-moment picture taken when we first woke up one morning, but it has turned out to be one of favorite pictures of us. It's almost palpable how happy we make each other in this pic.
3 Generations: my mom, me, Delilah (all of us between 13 and 18 months)
13 comments:
What a beautiful, special post Rachael! I know that you will be, and are already proving to be, just as special and wonderful a mom as your mom has been to you! Delilah is one very lucky little lady! Love you lots!!
I can't believe it has been 9 years. I loved reading your post and your memories of your mother. I didn't know here very long, but you are right, you were her princess. She was very special and Delilah is lucky to have your memories to hold on to. Your mama would be so proud of how you mother Red, the wife you are to Chris and the woman you have turned into...and she would be SO proud of your homemade fashion Friday posts. Didn't know she was a seamstress...guess that is where you get your talent from:)
A lovely tribute to your beautiful Mother. Now I see who Delilah really looks like! We only contributed the red hair. You are doing you mamma proud my dear daughter. She left left the best of her in you. I know she would be proud of all that you do and have accomplished and especially how great a "MOM' you are---just had to use those "quotes"--Love You
What a beautiful tribute!
Well, I am crying as I write this... what a beautiful tribute to your mother, absolutely beautiful. Before I started to write this comment, because of the beauty and significance of this post, I took a moment and prayed that the Lord instruct me what to write. I don't know why He is leading me to write what I am about to, after reading your post I have no doubt you already know this, but here it is,
She is so very, very proud of you.
xoxo
This is me giving you a hug, and knowing that my best friend is so because of what her mother taught her.
Also this is me wishing I had not read this at work and I am now trying to wipe away tears before all the guys that work for me see it...
I love you, Rachael. I think of you and your mom every Mother's Day and Christmas and I had forgotten the exact day of her passing but after this post, I will never forget. This is beautiful, and I hope you feel everyday how happy you made her and how you made her chest swell with pride. And undoubtedly still do. Love you, friend.
I am sorry that I missed this post, my love.
I adore you and think this was the most special post ever.
xo
Rachel - thank so much for sharing! I am so sorry for your loss (and Lilah's) - but hope that you will all be reunited one day. I cannot get over how much Lilah looks like her in her baby pic! uncanny! Wish I could give you a hug!
What a sweet & wonderful post. She was certainly an awesome lady...with a great legacy:) I still have fond memories of her myself - mostly from Boni's...oh, the days.
What a wonderful tribute to your mother! I know DiAnne is always looking down at you, Chris and Deliah with love and pride.
I love you very much and am so happy that you have so many wonderful memories of your mom and that she has passed so many of her talents down to you.
You are a GREAT Mother as well and I am proud to have you as a daughter.
Teared up reading this Rachael. Just jumped on to catch up on all that's new with you guys and this just touched my heart beyond belief. Love you dearly. xo
Lovely tribute, Rachael. She lives on in you...
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